Torn

My friend Shiela posted this video on her Facebook wall and since it was a lazy Sunday morning, I had the luxury of watching this almost hour-long documentary.  This is the sort of documentary that tears me apart.  It's a painful reminder of why I wanted never to come back to Manila and one of the reasons why I need to come back as well and what the heck can anyone do to change things anyway.

This is not your typical reality show that puts somebody out of his comfort zone in the UK by giving him the extreme challenge of placing him in the strange, alien nation of the Philippines. This is a serious documentary that shows the differences between a first world and third world country couldn't be starker and that indirectly raises difficult questions such as on the RH bill.  A bus driver in London earns a decent wage that allows him to live a comfortable life.  A jeepney driver in Manila can barely make ends meet even if he performs the job of three people.

When I was doing my architecture thesis in the university, going through the squatter areas along the Pasig River made me realize that I was more interested in the social issues than in the built structures.  Architecture was for the rich and those who could afford.  Of course there are socially conscious architects and urban planners, but I got drawn into the world of NGOs and government because they had the means and tools to impact society.  I worked in the private sector and in government and had this big dream of solving poverty and changing the world.  When I ended up living in China, getting married and having a child, the dream was shelved for the more realistic goal of feeding the family.

Watching a documentary like this brings up a lot of emotions -- sadness, overwhelming frustration over the fact that things haven't changed for the better.  On the one hand it's tempting to just live abroad and be detached from what's going on here and on the other hand, there is that nagging feeling that you ought not turn a blind eye.  The posting on youtube received a lot of comments many of which referred to corruption in the government.  Although corruption does play a major part, I believe it's much more than that.  Both developed and developing countries have their share of corrupt people and systems of governance but they manage to push their nations forward.  There's something more than corruption that's holding back the Philippines.  And many things have been said and written about our attitude, culture, behavior, history, politics, tendencies ad infinitum but despite the pessimism or harsh reality, there are people who continue to labor for and love the country, never losing hope and passing along their spark.  

It takes courage to live in this country or you're just oblivious to the situation. Documentaries like this may be painful to watch but we have to.