I have not been blogging regularly for a long, long time since I got to China, and even way before that. I had the excuse of not having a VPN but my friend, Sunny thankfully came to the rescue and fixed that problem months ago. However, I still couldn't muster the time to blog.
This September, I started working as an English Writing teacher at the Tianjin Foreign Studies University in Dagang City thirty minutes from where we live. I'd like to share some of my students' works which especially moved me and resonated with me.
This one about love within marriage was skillfully written by a perceptive and creative young lady, Sharon.
I remember a talk between my parents and me which taught me a lesson along the way. The subject of this talk is love within marriage.
Two years ago, I mustered up the courage to ask my parents some questions about married love when we sat in the living room and watched TV together. I took a sip of tea,then said "Mom, when couples have been married for a long time will they still be in love with each other or not? I mean what if we just get used to being with this person?" Mom said, "Well,there is love in married life. Marriage without love is perfunctory. If couples live without love,in fact,the marriage is dead."
As dad made tea he said, "Maybe love means passion for youth but for us who are married for a long time, passion is less. The meaning of love includes duty, obligation, care and forgiveness in daily life. Of course getting used to being with each other is a certain thing. However, normally it doesn't mean that there's no love between couples. Actually, we pay more attention to other contents of love, not just passion."
I got their words and said,"I see. But I also want to know why so many errant man leaves his wife for other women? Why is there the seven year itch?"
Dad said,"actually seven years just means a period of time.When couples are married for a long time, trifles in daily life may make them feel insipid, even forget the love between themselves. Meanwhile, men may be in the 35 to 45 demographic and they are the most mature and appealing to young ladies so they have to face many temptations. You know what, there are different physical structures between males and females. It causes males to have worse resistance to temptation. At this time, whether the man is mature enough or not is the important point, because if he's mature enough and has a good character, he will protect their marriage and think about his duty and obligation to his family, children, the future and his love for his wife. Then he won't do the wrong thing."
"The wife is also responsible for this thing."Mom said. She compared a person to a book. "Think about it. If we read a book for so many years, no matter how interesting the book is, it's certain that you will feel bored and don't want to read it anymore. But if the new contents are added to this book constantly, or gets a sequel, readers would like to continue reading it. "Dad nodded his head to express his agreement with mom's opinion. I said,"I don't want to be a humdrum woman, right?" They smiled at me,"yeah".
From this talk, I learned many things about love. It is really helpful for me to face and manage my marriage in the future. I think I got knowledge about keeping each other happy in the marriage and holding happiness. Thanks to my parents.
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